Monday, December 21, 2009


In senior seminar we received a 6 by 6 inch acrylic (see through) box. Basically we could do whatever we wanted with them as long as they could be displayed on a shelf in the gallery. Some people used the box as a frame, some to hold materials, some covered the box... others didn't even do the project. (not even going to start on how people expect to succeed as artists when they don't seize every opportunity.)

I spent a good amount of weeks (months?) looking for a dead bird to put in my box. Ended up with offers on dead mice, rats, and snakes... and found out that it's illegal to possess a dead bird. Ultimately, I couldn't find a bird and bought feathers to put in the box. I think the feathers worked better.
I guess this post is me wondering at the way things turn out. And wondering at being conceptual.
In painting especially, I don't think of an end result. If it's from life I obviously have expectations of what I think the painting should end up as, but I still never really know what's going to come out. When I'm done with the painting I'm always surprised. And painting non-representationally is even more surprising when I'm done. I never know where I'm going, I let the paint lead me more than I lead the paint.
It's kind of like working through a problem to find the solution. Which is not how I would go about 3d art like the box of feathers. I can visualize an end result and then somehow have to work backwards from that to end up with what I want.
And where does having a concept come into any of this...? I guess I don't know. I think I produce loaded pieces without realizing it. People talk about my concepts and ideas and what my art means, and I don't have answers if they ask me questions. I don't know what my art means. I don't know that it matters. It doesn't to me. There is just a force pushing me to do whatever it is I do.
Apparently that's not enough though for everyone else.
I guess what I really need to know is if it will help me or hurt me to try to have specific, concrete ideas. Because I always have ideas, they're just a little floaty and fuzzy and I kind of like them that way. Is that bad? Does this mean I'm lacking something as an artist?

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Photography Collaboration: Artist Statment Attempt 1

My goal recently has been to lessen the separation of photography concepts from painting concepts in my process. Undoing natural barriers and smoothly connecting ideas from two very different mediums has proven to be quite challenge. Now, at the end of the semester I may have found my niche in combining photography and painting in an "outside" way. I am almost cheating my mind into believing that I am painting a picture, rather than photographing one.

The collaboration process was both intimate and immensely surprising at times. Finding, at the first try, a partner in art who is so naturally attuned to my process (and vice-versa) was breathtaking. As a painter who creates for her viewer, it was incredible for me to become both a viewer and a contributor to what was happening. I began to develop my own, separate concept of what painting on the body could mean. For me, it was becoming close to the painting by removing the separating factor of the canvas. Rather than painting in a triple (artist, paint, canvas) she had opted to paint as a partner equal to her paints. There was no go-between, she was in complete contact and control of her creation. I was merely documenting this partnership, offering advice from my personal experience as a painter.

I am a young mother.
I am a virgin mother.
I am a bad mother.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

This last photo shoot was immensely successful. I think. Drove all the way to Arcadia with took us 4 hours to get back because of the snow.
Anyway, I had a pretty decent critique on the previous photos shown up here in class the other day. They really pushed me in the right direction. Choosing color and coordinating with a backdrop. Doing this also allowed me to get even more involved with the process and decision-making. It felt good and I have a few good shots that will be good for printing once they are color-edited.
So exciting!!!!